Today was certainly a test…but not one you could “pass” or “fail”, just one you had to experience. It is just a test based on its own merit, one on which you could sit back and review and understand its place in the moment. A proverb stated “You hear and forget, you see and remember, you do and understand.” Today was a chance to understand.
Through the many challenges, I don’t think I could have handled them any differently than I did at those moments. I am still working on being the watcher, on seeing my mind rather than being my mind, so I was not prepared for the giant steps today would have me take. I caught glimpses, but the pull was just too strong.
So today I did, and I understand. I understand I am not ready to run yet, so I will continue to walk. I understand I simply cannot expect to get to the summit without many tries from the base of it first. And I can honestly say that I am happy to have seen this, to have done this, and to know that I can at least see what it is I am not yet prepared to accomplish.
I am also happy that I was able to collect these observations and not hold on to them. The reactions today are NOT me, they are my mind, and I certainly am becoming less my mind each and every day. I am not disappointed, I am not angry, I just am.
Find health, give peace, be love…