The Final Time

I walk by the place where we first hugged
And I sat at the place where we first kissed
And I laid at the place where I first loved you
And a part of me died inside.
I wipe away tears that I cannot stop
And wish away words I cannot take back
While remembering words I wish were true again
I love you…I love you.
There is nothing that can heal this boy
There is nothing that can make this man whole
I am lost helplessly and completely
I wish I was born into something you could not live without.
I have hurt you, and for this I do not forgive myself
I have forgotten you, and in this I cannot reconcile
Except to say I know that I do not deserve you
Because I do not deserve to know what you can provide.
I will die rather than live a lie
I know I am doomed to repeat such tailored agony
Until I have nothing left to give and nothing left to live for
And I will close my eyes for the final time.