What you feel is life, what you live is another story.

Just Sitting Here (A Poem)

Listening to you I understand my own frailties.
My own need to be special, to be different, to be unique in your world.
I hear the words escape from your lips,
See them fall from your fingertips,
And I know.

I want to be a god in your church,
To which you sacrifice all things,
The bed we share an altar where everything is offered,
Everything is given,
And everything is received.

I want to know that I am safe,
That the demons of this world hold no power here.
I want to feel your virgin arms around my neck,
Seek the sacred seed within you
While never knowing the fires of hell.

Such a folly of the weakened mind!
I fall away from my purpose while searching for theirs,
I walk away from my truth to find a piece of what others see,
Amidst the wailings of a child left alone in the wilderness
I can not find the silence I call my own.

Now the gray skies crack to birth the bluish sky
And I feel the fresh sunlight on my face.
A new day within the day has dawned,
My direction changes towards the dusty paths
That call my name.

I find company in the emptiness,
Truth in the myriad of lies.
I’ve seen angels with the longest of horns,
And the devil adorned with the whitest of wings.
Such is the contradiction of such things!

And then there is you.
A soft landing after a long fall,
The cool shade following a baking in the Sun.
How lucky I have been to find you,
How wonderful it’s been to hear you call.

I caress your face
As the clouds make love to the sky.
I call for you
As the trees pretend to know my name.
I reach for you in the ether.

And what a wonderful emptiness it is!
That space where you should be,
Somewhere between this footprint in the sand
And the million grains that separate us,
There is nothing but what should be.

And there we go…
Through that promised land we know
Forever is not eternity,
And eternity is not forever
If we’ve lost that sense of wonder.

1 Comment

  1. Jovita

    Beautiful. I can really relate to this.