She’s beautiful, like a spring forest,
I am unable to speak in her visage,
Fumbling for words, am I,
My own thoughts betray my stoic form.
Soft, like the snow brushed softly on my winter’s canvas,
She’s there, in my soul written through my hand,
I can taste and touch but I cannot feel,
For close though she is, the distance divides us still.
My heart bleeds upon these pages,
Profuse as am I, inconsolable in their desire,
The Magnificent Goddess I cannot embrace,
Yet cannot seem to let go of.
I heard that you loved me, It may have come from the whisper in my ear, As you spread your breath throughout the Universe, Kept me spellbound with the comma that you used. I heard that you loved me, It may have come from a word or two you've written, As the ink you poured from your soul, Streaked upon the stained paper of my mind. I heard that you loved me, It didn't come from what you've done, In your absence I only heard your fear, As you fought one destiny with the sword of another. Because though I heard you loved me, My reality is different from that dream. As I lay my head to rest in the the pasture, I only share myself with blades of grass that save me from the grave. Yes, I heard that you loved me, Perhaps it was an echo from some oath once spoken in a cave, Or some twinkle from a star burned out so many years ago, A man wobbled in his humanity, seeking balance in the shade. For I lived when I heard that you have loved me, And died in the moment written by an empty, outstretched hand, No more to call your name for now I am shouting against the wind, Deafness comes especially harsh to those who wish to hear. Now, I heard that you love me, With every crunching of the stones beneath my feet, As I head west, and you stay east, The Sun now setting, but it surely will rise again.
To dive deep, So deep you are dying, Is to find that you never needed the surface, Or the shore, To truly be alive. We've all been drowning, Our heads held down in the depths, Struggling, fighting for the air we think we need, Lost in unconsciousness, The dream is dying in our darkness. Then we can awaken, Realizing that breath was just a fallacy, That rebirth was the only way, Resurrection is not rising from the dead, Instead, it is life itself that never ends. Rebirth is the only way, To realize you were never born at all, But in your own moment of conception, You became a dream shared by the countless who came before you, A shared lie that somehow we are special in our separateness. The idea of man, that he is but a man, The ideas of man, that it is all but living, We flounder in our forgetfulness and accept our mediocrity, Without ever knowing this is but an agreement we have made, With those who have accepted these things before us. Behold, though, the love you feel, That not-so-subtle reminder, That you know a soul somehow, In a moment's wispy spark, You see what is and what was in a flash. What you feel, unknowing seer of the unseen, Is a Universe igniting, The flash, a beginning of something that has no ending, The spark, a light of something that knows no darkness, The emptiness recognizes itself in abundance. So, be patient with me as I pause in wonder, As I bend to inhale your fragrance, Without ever disturbing a petal or your stem, allowing Nature to do Her thing, I smile in the memory, I could not smell a thing as I was drowning. Acidic is the water as it fills your nostrils, The sting forever echoing in your mind, as you succumb to the silence, Only broken by the sound of your heart beating, Breaking, falling in shards to the bottom of the sea, Scattered about by the currents all around you. The flower...I wish to smell the flower... I wish to dance in the fields once again, Climb the hills and stand on top once again, That view, seeing as far as my eyes will see, If only I could inhale that air once again. Awakened suddenly, I gasp at abundant air, The scent of renewal fills my soul, The fragrance of realization guides me to my stillest place. My heart races in the endeavor, My mind quiets at my holy command. And I see...with my eyes now shut, I can feel her all around me, Her whispers in my ear raising bumps on my skin, Her soft touches bringing my soul to full attention, Her presence filling my body as I inhale all that she is. I realize she is not just the flesh, But a memory...a reminder of who I am when I am awakened, Of a soul shared before the moment I conceived of myself, The moment I felt fractured from who I am, When I was born, the best of me forgotten in their lessons. I realize she is also the flesh, The curves of her body call to me, The subtle was her lips move when she speaks torture my veiled manhood, My heartbeat rises in tune with the rest of me, My nerves on fire as my soul begs for the reunion. What is one cannot be denied, yet what separates us cannot surrender. I enter what surrounds me, our breath joins in the ether. Upon this altar we have gained eternity, yet in this moment of reflection, We may lose heaven, be cast from the Garden forevermore, To roam aimlessly through the deserts of our lives. As the sands scorch my feet, I remember... The cold chill of my ocean, And as I struggle for air in my effort, I remember when there was no air to be had at all, And I smile, For the sweat that flows from my skin will not kill me. I have already died, some would say, And been reborn, Reborn to love her, reborn to love the ocean And the desert, and everywhere in between. Yet, I've been picking at the blisters on my feet, Wondering where the hell I put my shoes. Through the blistering sands we've walked, And the crushing depths for which we, the intrepid, have nearly drowned, We stand tall, and ready for the storm, Not as fodder for the winds to topple, But as warriors who have slain the mighty beasts within. Goodnight, to the dreams we go oft repeated in our slumber, Awakened souls yet prone to the human need for sleep, Gone forever to pass the night alone to another, To discover the wicked, wandering flight we often sail alone, Yet to never lose a moment's passing thought of our certain crashing. A crumbled mess we'll be, Laughing in our misfortune, gazing at the stars together, Hearing distant drums beat in the glow of an evening fire, And we'll turn to each other in surprising synchronicity, Sleeping, drowning, burning souls no more.
When the world has forsaken you, I will be here, strong. When the ocean's waves become too strong, I will carry you to shore. When the driving rains become too much for you to bear, I will shelter you. When the only thing you hear is the echo of your own heartbeat, I will be there to hold your hand. For I am your friend, and I love you. When the night sky is all you see, I will point you in the Sun's direction. When the blinding rays blind you from reality, I will shield you from the light. When the evening chill causes your soul to shake, I will warm you with all that I am. When doubts and uncertainty cause your ground to shake, I will guide you to solid ground. For I am your friend, and I love you. When you feel all alone and the beasts howl all around, I will hold the torch beside you. When the stones begin to fly and the blood begins to flow, I will plant my feet beside you. When the angels flee and the demons come, I will endure, and never leave your side. When the tears flow down your beautiful face, We will shed them together, you and I. For I am your friend, and I love you.
From where I stand, You're beautiful, Like in the way The yellow poplars bloom, Or the freshwater pearls shine in the early morning sun, Or the goldenrod sway in the light spring breeze along a shimmering stream. From where I sleep, You're beautiful, Like in the way The blue moon lights your path, Or the cardinals sing to announce your arrival, Or the viceroys are born to dance about the fields where you play. From where I am, You're beautiful, Please don't change a thing, Live your life so beautifully, Test your dreams by putting your toes lightly in the water, Then jump, and let's swim in joy together, And dance to the sound of the dulcimer. Because... You're beautiful... Not out there like a star to be admired, Or some flower to be picked, But within me where you are, forever... Where you are free to know... You're beautiful.
I heard you angry, I heard you sad, I heard you curse me, I heard you had. I heard your promises, I heard you sigh, I heard the whispers, I heard you lie. In the moments, We all despise, We either drown, Or we rise. I heard you gasp, The surface cracked, But in the end, The will had lacked. So off we go, To the great beyond, The roughest seas, In the smallest pond. A rotted seed, That cannot grow, Will surely die, In the summer snow. I heard you say, All wounds mend, I heard you swear, There'd be no end. I heard your laughter, The stories told, I heard deceit, The truth behold. I heard you breathe, The Sun did rise, I heard you question, Your own disguise. I heard time stop, In pools of blue, Believe me dear, I heard you.
Cradled there, parts denied, Parts that fade as I have died, The liar's echoes always rang, From the window where I now hang... Poisoned air, cannot breathe, Lost in darkness as I grieve, I try to play the part you crave, As I lie in alone my own grave... Summer came, winter soon, An angel's shadow by the Moon, I lie naked in the snow, Wanting things you'll never know... Finally done, the wounded numb, Searching for the peace to come, Will you live to rue or to rejoice, That you failed to call, to hear my voice? Sunny day, joyful room, I'll be forgotten as flowers bloom, Somewhat lost in my disguise, Are my own forgotten, tearful eyes. With some dismay, it's time to say, Goodbye, I walk away, Forget the song, the road too long, I'm lost in what is right and wrong... So take care, no need to stare, I've found the thinnest, freshest air, Tonight forever joined to me, In tomorrow's destiny...
Something wonderful has happened to me, and I don’t know what I’ve done to deserve it. I’ve asked the Universe countless times, and the only answers I receive are the only ones I seek.
She kisses me. Randomly at times, with purpose in others. The little shock waves that course through my body are like a powerful tide that has surfaced within me. There is an intention in this power, and I am reminded of something I was thought was only for others. I am reminded of a dream I once had during lonely nights, a vision I’d often see when I wondered what my purpose was. I am reminded of an indistinguishable song I’d often hear, and a rhythm I’d feel when the darkness enveloped even the sunniest moments of my life.
I live in the memories of her, as the vision, the feeling, the dream. I bask in the glow of always knowing she existed, even when doubt covered my heart with emptiness. I exist in a remembrance of something wonderful, and now I exist in her arms as though I have never, ever, been anywhere else.
She takes my body in her arms, and I feel my soul begin to dance. She holds my face in her hands, looking at me with those beautiful, blue eyes and promises me forever. She takes my thoughts, my ideas, my vision and gives them such clarity that I can see things as I was seeing for the very first time.
She gives me her fears, her hopes, and her dreams. She tells me her deepest secrets, and stands tall with me when the strong winds come. She shields my eyes when the Sun is too bright, and lays her head on my shoulder when, somehow, she knows I need it there. She takes my arm in hers, and kisses my cheek, as if there was some way she knew that was exactly what I was hoping for.
Beyond love there is something else. Beyond our human frailties there is a power only we, as Two of One, as the soul’s mates, know. When two pieces of the same puzzle land mysteriously in the same place, and fit perfectly, we must honor that union. When something brings two hearts together, we must live for that beat lest we die in the silence.
To leave her is worse than an amputation, and to watch her go is like a piece of me is missing. We share a distance but a desire to see it close. We shed our tears in the spaces we share when we can, and we offer ourselves up to whatever power seems bent on bringing us together. I have never worshiped in such a place, but if this is heaven let me polish those pearly gates. I have found a paradise in her, and will not stop until I’ve built one for us to share.
In that church we will reside. Among the trees, climbing hills and shaking the dust off our feet we will remember our divinity. One day in some future time and place, we will look into each other’s eyes, hold each other’s hands, and we will share a memory. A tear or two may spill from our eyes as we gaze silently into the souls we once could only dream about. A silent whisper may form from our lips as struggle to find the words. Then there will be a kiss. There will always be a kiss.
I will, then, stare into her beautiful blue eyes, those very eyes that captured me so long ago. The wrinkles we have gained over the years will be unnoticeable, yet the memories we have created will never fade. We will embrace, and I will be filled with the memory of our first touch, our first kiss, and the first time she held my hand. Gone will be the disappointments of this world, and alive will spring that moment of truth when we offered a promise made and a lived promise kept. We will live the vow we swore first with silence, then with a phrase, and then a life devoted to love, truth and the devotion very few ever get a chance to live.
We will share a remembrance of something wonderful, a remembrance that began with two souls colliding and eternally continued in a story of love. We will just lay here, together, living by our own rules, and paying no attention what we hear around us.
I love her. She loves me. What a time of something wonderful we share.