Fast Forward

I sink into the depths of despair,
Seeing no hope, no choice and no way out.
I want so desperately for you to turn back the hands of time,
And to simply change your mind.
 
I am lost, I am nowhere and nothing.
I can see only my own suffering as sleep escapes me.
Through the tears and the exhaustion I bathe in it, 
Suffering, my friend, you have returned.
 
I can feel nothing but the numb stare through eyes not yet opened.
I can’t sense my own breath but fake it in repose,
My mind is racing but I hear none of it,
The voices rage as I allow myself to be swallowed by the storm.
 
I walk alone down an unholy path,
Toward some unseen destiny,
The sun does not rise yet the stars still fade,
The noose grows tighter as the anger begins to swell.
 
Why?  I ask no one in particular.
I hold this moment in supreme disparity.
The question was the Daybreak
The answers…
 
Fast forward.
 
I sit in stillness, not seeing hope but feeling it.
The waves of Love and Joy fill my Soul,
I know I am not alone even if I sit in complete solitude.
I can love her without even having to hold her hand again.
 
I have let go of despair, and Love has filled that space,
I embrace the Universe and refuse to let go,
I seek the Love you have within you,
And pay no attention to the judgments you view me with.
 
I can feel your Love shower me as you look at me.
I can feel your Soul as you speak without ever saying a word.
I know you are getting to a spot where you need no reservation,
You simply need arrive.
 
I reach out my hand,
Not to help you or have you help me,
But just to say, “Let’s walk together
And share the journey for a while.”
 
I no longer feel any anger,
And the momentary waves of sadness quickly reside,
Replaced by a smile in my Heart
For where those waves have taken me.
 
I give thanks for the suffering,
I give thanks for the noose that saw no end,
I give my Love to you expecting nothing in return,
I give my Heart to the world and seek no reward.
 
The Gift and the Giver are One,
There is no separation nor distinction outside of our mind,
Am I holding your hand or are you holding mine?
The Truth sees no difference.
 
I now open my eyes, my Soul refreshed,
I inhale Peace deeply and exhale Love freely,
Ready to experience this moment in what it has to offer,
Ready to…
 
Fast forward into Now.
 

2 thoughts on “Fast Forward”

  1. I enjoyed reading your poem. I did slightly stumble on one line: Not to help you are have you help me. An extra word in there or perhaps it is as you intended? If so, I’m most curious to it’s meaning, if it’s no trouble. Thanks!

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