I could end it with that, and be done with the discussion. Yet, I’ll surrender to the need to expand on it, and to share some personal experiences and insight. There is an act of surrender in everything we do, and we can see it simply by shifting our focus.
We aren’t taught the art of surrender in our society. We are taught that surrender is an act of weakness reserved for losers. We are taught that quitters surrender, and then we make an agreement to agree with the various negative descriptions of surrender we are given. In essence, we surrender our experience to the egoic definition of strength, weakness, winning and losing.
I used to see surrender as an act of fear, and the refusal to surrender as an act of “heart” or courage. Yet, I’ve discovered that even what we view as a refusal to surrender is, in fact, a surrender. I make dozens, if not hundreds, of choices to surrender each and every day. Perhaps I choose to surrender to old behavior patterns. Maybe I choose to surrender to new perspectives. Maybe I’ve decided to fall into old ruts, or perhaps I’ve decided to make new footprints. Either way I am offering myself to the choice, I am surrendering to the experience of either renewing old agreements or creating new ones.
There are instances when events that seem out of our control become difficult to surrender to. A job loss, a relationship that ends, an illness, or any event that seems beyond our control can set us off on a tangent of suffering simply by our seeming refusal to surrender to the event. Our refusal to surrender doesn’t mean we haven’t surrendered, it simply means we refuse to see that we’ve surrendered. We have, by either surrendering to the refusal or by surrendering to the event.
You can’t refuse to surrender, you can only recognize your choices on what you surrender to. Those choices will reflect your current states of mind, and you can begin to see (become aware) of where you are simply by observing what choices you have made.
Do I curse the company that I used to work for or do I embrace the change? The answer will help me discover where my mind is, and to what master I am answering to. Am I attacking my old lover and trying to make them suffer? Again, my answer will show me what master I am serving. Am I afraid of the changes coming or eagerly awaiting their arrival? Yes, you guessed it, the answer will tell me everything I need to know.
We are all given choices to make, and often those agreements became a simple choice between acting in the illusion of fear or acting in the reality of love. While love allows us the illusion of fear, fear does not allow for the reality of love. What we surrender to is our choice, and our experience will directly result from which we agree to have. We are all-powerful creators, and we create our existence within each and every moment. We simply need to surrender to the experience we wish to have.